In August 2010 three Maidenhead United fans were banned from attending home games, by a kangaroo court, for crimes they didn't commit.
These men promptly encountered a jobsworth security blockade, and so escaped to the non-league underground.
Today, still stigmatised by the MUFC Ltd hierarchy, they survive as supporters of fancy.
If you enjoy a train away day - and if you can find them - then maybe you can share a drink with ... the K-team!

Tuesday, 31 October 2017

2017/18 Diary ~ October


This would've been ideal Fancy Dresslemania XVIII fixture, I think, so to get it in midweek was a real disappointment (esp. as the Gulls look likely candidates for relegation)

O'Neil Odofin - then Torquay captain - was one of the standout players during a cracking FA Youth Cup tie at York Road in 2014; he didn't make the grade at Plainmoor, though, and is now at Whitehawk after spells at various non-league clubs including Three Bridges (Conversely, a couple of Maidenhead players from that night - namely David Rogalski and Olly McCoy - have fared better, albeit away from Berkshire.)

Rerouted from the M4 due to news that the M5 was closed, the MurdoMobile - passengers: me, Craig, and Fuzz - passed Stonehenge at 14:30; we were enjoying the magnificent views of Babbacombe Bay, from the Cary Arms (I've now visited this pub in the '90s, '00s and '10s), before 5pm

Quite why the team coach driver decided to stick with the motorways is anyone's guess; we initially thought that Scouse Mick was on a wind-up

Unusual sight of supporters hanging around outside the ground - located among residential streets, which made a welcome change from the industrial (estate) wasteland that surrounds Chester's stadium - waiting for news as to whether the match would actually go ahead (with a delayed kick-off)

A few (too many) extra pre-match beverages in the bar (smaller than you might expect, but I liked it), which was managed by a former St Luke's and Newlands Girls' pupil!

You should've come on the A-roads sang the vociferous travelling support (72 of us; some of whom left during halftime) at the end of an embarrassing 4-0 defeat; an archetypal 'good day out ruined by 90 minutes of football' … made worse by rumours that Aldershot would be getting the Bell End on Saturday …

(Match highlights here)

Adrian Allen's wonder goal from 2001 is what immediately springs to mind when I think of this fixture … that and Trevor Kingham stood in the doorway, barring halftime entry to Stripes, as Reading and Aldershot hoolies threw chairs and fists at each other behind him

Load of patronising wank is how Dover fan Callum - currently studying in South Korea - once described Non-League Day; reasonably accurate, in my opinion, although he has since changed his tune

Dahlias (not Micky Chatt's, although surely approaching similar prize-winning quality) for £1.00, runner beans (MASSIVE) for 50p, and a free bag of Bramley apples, were procured from various houses on our walk up Cherry Garden Lane to the Shire Horse #thegoodlife

ENHEAD was the Bell End buffer zone, so it transpired, ergo my decision to do something else - spend time with the family - was justified (not being able to stand behind the goal Maidenhead are attacking, at York Road, pisses me off); a real shame, in my opinion, that the best part of the ground was unoccupied for a game such as this

Rebellion Engineer, sat in the pub garden (watched by a dog sat on the pub roof!), went down a treat

Satisfied with the result, when I checked the score at 5pm, although the realisation that we'd conceded a 90th minute equaliser obviously removed some of the gloss; Craig reckoned that a draw was fair

Horses - police, not shire - in Maidenhead town centre certainly an unusual sight!

Our first goal an excellent bit of play - not least the finish - from Adrian Clifton; pity no home fans on the Bell End to celebrate with

Twelfth in the table, after a third of the season, is more than acceptable; now, if only we could sort out the away form (P3 L3 F2 A9 - including games vs Chester and Torquay - since that impressive win at Sutton)

(Match highlights here)

Home draw? Check. Lower division opposition? Tick. Opposition struggling in lower division? Well, two outta three ain't bad!

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Wrexham lost to Fylde, but our league visit there on 2nd December - the same weekend as FA Cup 2nd Round Proper - remains in the balance thanks to Ryan Upward's 91st minute winner (described by Craig as 'daylight robbery')

(Match highlights here)

Didn't ever envisage attending this fixture, seeing as it coincided with the 5th Maidenhead Beer Festival. But, as the day approached, I - like many others, it seems - decided that the time of year (the previous four festivals have all been in the summer) and location (the 'earmarked for demolition redevelopment' leisure centre) left much to be desired; instead we went for food and drinks at Norden Farm, sitting next to Viva Neil Diamond, before getting drenched on the walk home

One long whingefest about who's club is more shit is how Callum the (aforementioned) Dover fan described the post-match beers that followed our 2-2 draw at Fancy Dresslemania XII in 2012 … and he wasn't wrong, so it's remarkable to think that, five years later, Dover vs Maidenhead is a National League fixture!

Verifiable head-scratching re the Maidenhead team sheet, at least on first glance: no Clerima, Comley or Marks; Upward and Clifton on the bench; both Goodman AND Inman starting - the latter, presumably, in midfield - as new loan signing Moses 'Steve' Emmanuel made his Magpies debut against a former club

Eight hundred and thirty-seven was the attendance; shows how far we've come yada yada when a sub four-figure crowd, for a Maidenhead United league game, is met with disdain

Resigned to our run of successive away defeats stretching to four games, when ex-Burnham striker Ryan Bird notched for the home side, so Adrian Clifton's/ Jake Hyde's (delete as appropriate) 93rd minute equaliser was worthy of a celebratory rave

(Match highlights here)


^^^ Tuesday 24th, National League, won 3-2 (A) 

Bowie's back yard; fond memories, for me, of getting the train with Willie T to an Isthmian League Div One game in March 2000 (0-0; Att. 289) - Adrian Allen made his debut and wore white shoes in the clubhouse afterwards (giving rise to his 'Griswold' nickname) - and an opening day Conference South win in 2008 (Lee Newman with a brace; Att. 438)

Relatively OK journey (thank goodness, esp. as it was my turn to drive); we were getting high fives from a furry mascot (#notaeuphenism), and supping pre-match beverages in the impressive Ravens bar, less than two hours after leaving Maidenhead at 5pm

Only four goals had been conceded by Bromley at home all season, but a mockery was made of that stat during a frantic first half: 1-0 (10 mins; sloppy defending?), 1-1 (17 mins; Adrian Clifton header from a corner), 1-2 (21 mins; Harry Pritchard penalty after Sam Barrett had been fouled … near enough the only decision that the referee got right all evening), 2-2 (23 mins; well-worked team goal), 2-3 (35 mins; Clifton with a finish straight from the Ian Wright textbookthe Arsenal legend was justifiably proud)

Moses ('he left cos you're shit') was lively, while Yaya will rightly receive plaudits for his brace, but Christian Smith gets my Man of the Match vote ('ever the contrarian') for a combative and commanding midfield performance typified by a CRUNCHING tackle, early in the second half, that clearly indicated the Magpies would not be rolling over

Lots of credit to the travelling support: decent in number and loud throughout

Eleventh in the table; back above Ebbsfleet - Sean Marks, BTW, thinks they're 'shit' - after Torquay won at Stonebridge Road #LOL

York Road should have an artificial pitch (the Chairman, after all, is/ was 'a long term advocate'), as results would indicate that we enjoy playing on them: win vs Hungerford at Slough in the B&B Cup Final, draw at Maidstone on the opening day, win at Sutton, win at Bromley …

(Match highlights here)


Double-digit team names will be an absolute necessity to adequately tell the tale of Fancy Dresslemania XVIII in April, not so much a run-of-the-mill league game in October

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Really surprised to learn, while kicking a ball about on the outfield at Sutton Cricket Club (where we were attending a 1st birthday party), that Dean Inman had signed for Billericay Town; I read about our 1-1 draw - the Magpies had lead at the break, thanks to Remy Clerima's first goal for the club - when we stopped for food, at the Bells of Ouzeley, on the way home

(Match highlights here)

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